Today was my Karate examination. I tested for 2nd Kyu and even though I will not know my results until Tuesday, I had the best exam ever.
This was the first time that I was able to do my own Karate. As soon as I stepped out on the floor, everything felt right. I did every movement the best that I could, without the normal nervous pressure that I usually feel at my exams. I went out there and just did “it” for the first time for my eight test in four years. The feeling today was different than any other exam because my mind was not about what could happen or what happened in the past, it was about the moment. Nothing else mattered except what I was doing at that moment in time.
Sensie Cieplik said that once you let it go and just do it, your Karate will be good. I am not sure what my examiners felt but I could not have done any better than I did tonight. My movements felt extremely strong, stronger than ever before and my punches and kicks were connected. I knew that if someone was to walk in front of me, they would not be walking after I hit them. The room almost went dark and I didn’t notice anyone around me for almost the entire test. I was also very happy that I didn’t gas out like I have at exams before. The training, the new diet and dropping 25 pounds of fat over the last five months seems to have made a big difference.
I had Sensei Cieplik as one of my examiners and he was right in front of me while I did all of my kihon. I focused on two crossing lines on the wall just above and behind him. I didn’t want to focus on my examiners and looking at that part of the wall really kept my mind on the task at hand.
I also felt that Pass, keri or fail, I did my absolute best Karate for that moment in time and I will be happy with the result. Going into the exam with this attitude changed me in such a positive way that I am going to try and use the same focus in my training.
Over the last few months, Sensei Noia, Sensei Cieplik, Sensei Plocharczyk and Sensei Gatch have been complementing me on certain movements. There was even one class when Sensei Noia and Sensei Plocharczyk said that I threw the best front punch during Jion that they ever saw me throw. Tonight I went into each movement trying to capture that same mindset and I feel that I succeeded.
I was also very excited and honored having Sensei Cieplik as one of my examiners. I was happy that I was able to show him, at my exam, that I am doing things that he has shared with me over the past two years of taking his class.
I also feel that not worrying about getting that next rank has helped. I still have my goal of getting my black belt one day but when I do, I want to make sure that I truly deserve it where as before I was more worried just about getting it.
I was watching some old video tapes from my past tournaments a couple weeks ago and I am so happy that I can see how I have improved over the last four years. Just seeing and feeling better than before is reward enough and I believe that this marks a turning point in my Karate going forward.
I guess I should also mention that I can hardly walk now because my hips and hamstrings feel like they were rolled over by a bus from squeezing the floor so hard but that’s a small price to pay for how I feel mentally.
Win, loose or draw, this is certainly the exam where I did my best and my own Karate.